Are You Being Authentically You? – Stop Self-Silencing EP #2

By Fifi Mason

Have you ever felt like a wallflower, blending into the background while others take centre stage?

That’s how I felt in my business back in 2019. I was there, but not really there, you know?

Imagine you’re at party, filled with friends, peers, and even mentors. But instead of mingling, you’re tucked away in a corner, almost as if you’re trying to become one with the wallpaper. Sure, it feels safe, but what opportunities are you missing? What connections are left unmade?

Visibility in your business (or in any aspect of your life), is about stepping into the spotlight and letting people see the real you.

Because let’s face it, no one ever made an impact by hiding in the shadows.

When I finally decided to get visible, to show more of the real me to the world, that’s when the magic started to happen.

I began attracting opportunities and clients who were a perfect fit, and my business became a source of joy rather than stress.

What is visibility?

Visibility isn’t just about being in the spotlight; it’s about shining your true colours in that light. It’s one thing to be seen, another to be recognised for who you truly are.

But visibility can come in many forms, so let’s break it down.

Personal Visibility

Firstly, there is visibility in our personal lives. It’s about how we present ourselves in our relationships and within our communities.

Are you showing our true self to your family, friends, and neighbours? Or are you wearing a mask, hiding your genuine thoughts and feelings in your day to day interactions?

Being visible in our personal life means being open and honest in our relationships, sharing our real experiences, and not shying away from being our authentic selves, even if it makes us feel vulnerable.

Social Media Visibility

Then we have visibility on social media and your online presence. Something that’s become a huge part of our daily lives. Here, visibility is about how we choose to present ourselves online.

Are we sharing the polished, picture-perfect version of our lives, or are we being real and authentic? Social media gives us a platform to express ourselves, share our stories, and connect with people all over the world. But it also comes with the challenge of balancing that authenticity with the pressure to conform.

Personal Brand Visibility

Then there is visibility in a professional capacity and our personal brand. Personal branding is much more than just a buzzword. It’s a crucial element of how we present ourselves in our professional lives.

But let me be clear here – developing a personal brand isn’t about constructing a persona, it’s about being deliberate and thoughtful in how you portray yourself in the professional capacity.

Personal branding is essentially about storytelling – it’s the narrative you create and share about who you are, what you stand for, your unique skills, experiences, and values.

It’s the combination of your expertise, your personality, your values, and the way you express these. This becomes how you’re seen or perceived with peers, colleagues, clients, and within your industry as a whole.

Creating this kind of visibility requires introspection and a deep understanding of your identity. It’s about identifying what sets you apart, and then finding ways to communicate that effectively. This could be through the content you create, the way you network, or even how you present your ideas.

Ultimately, your personal brand should reflect who you are, not just what you do. It’s a blend of your expertise and your personal touch – the qualities that make you, you!

When done correctly, personal branding not only helps you stand out in your field but also allows you to build more authentic and meaningful relationships.

Promotional Visibility

The final form of visibility is more for your business or promotional, and might involve email marketing or sharing services and offers.

But it’s not just about selling a product or service; it’s about building trust and connection with your audience. Every piece of content, every email, is an opportunity to reinforce your authentic brand and build meaningful relationships.

In all these forms of visibility, the common thread is authenticity. Whether it’s in our personal lives, our social media presence, for our personal brands, or in our business interactions, being true to ourselves is key.

So what do I really mean by the term authenticity?

What is Authenticity?

Authenticity or being authentic means you’re not just playing a part – you’re living your truth.

This alignment is where the magic happens. Where we deeply connect with others, people in our lives, those we want to inspire and uplift, the people you want to serve. It’s that feeling of rightness in your gut.

When you’re being authentic you, you’ll find that life and business opportunities just come to you, that people know of you, like you and trust you.

I explore more of what authenticity truly means in my mini-book “Stop Self-Silencing”, which inspired this mini podcast series.

In the book I explore the link between authenticity and vulnerability, which is what incredible research and author Brené Brown discovered through her research into authenticity, connection, vulnerability and shame. She says:

“To be authentic, we must cultivate the courage to be imperfect — and vulnerable. We have to believe that we are fundamentally worthy of love and acceptance, just as we are.” – Brené Brown

This quote has such a powerful impact on me. It expresses the challenge we can face when being authentic. And highlights how we need to be brave enough to allow others to see who we truly are, and fully accept that who we are is worthy and good enough.

What I purposely don’t dig into in the book (as I’ll go into this in my next book Impact Rules), is how being authentic is to be fully aligned with and true to our values and beliefs, and being sure that we also express those values and beliefs with the world.

That we need to be sure that our self-perception aligns with how others perceive us. So how do we do that?

Are You Showing Up Authentically?

I want you to take a moment of reflection now and consider these questions. They are designed to help you figure out if you are being truly YOU, and showing up as your authentic self.

Question 1: Do you have a good understanding of your core values and how they apply to you? What are your core values? What do they mean to you? How do they impact both you and the people you support?

Knowing what you stand for and what values are most important to you, is the first step to showing up authentically.

If you’re unsure, this is the perfect starting point for a deeper dive into self-awareness. Have a look at my blog post, ‘Discover Your Core Values to Guide Your Personal Brand,’ for some guidance on this journey.

If you are clear on those core values, then reflect on these next few questions.

Question 2: Are you staying true to your values and principles in your personal relationships? Are you actually living to your own values? Are you expressing them to friends and family in everything you do and say, and how you live your life?

Take ‘purpose,’ for instance — a value I deeply embody in both my business and personal life. Firstly, my work is a way of fulfilling my purpose, but ‘purpose’ is also what I aim to help others discover through my coaching and programs. Secondly, I find it also comes up in my conversations with friends and family and acts as a driving force in my life.

Then there’s ‘authenticity’ — a value I’m sure you’ve noticed is a big part of my brand (yes, I talk about it a lot 😂).

Question 3: Do you consistently communicate your values in your content and through your actions? Are they obvious to others? Are you actively expressing them in some way?

This is about being sure you are communicating your core values in everything you put out there — whether it’s a blog post, a social media update, or the way you handle your business and personal interactions.

Question 4: Would people who know you well say that your online perception reflects who you truly are?

We might think that we are being our true selves online and on social media, but those who know us well might see things we can’t. To be sure on this, you could ask a friend or family member these two questions:

  1. What words would they use to describe your online presence?
  2. Does what they know of you (who you are as a person) align with what you’re sharing with the world?

    Take the Authentic Self Personal Brand Assessment

    If you’re want to be sure you’re truly being your authentic self, I’ve got just the thing for you. Take the ‘Authentic Self – Personal Brand Assessment (PBA)’.

    This tool is designed to help you dig deeper into your personal brand and gauge how well it aligns with your true self. It’s an opportunity to reflect, assess, and perhaps even rediscover aspects of yourself you’ve overlooked.

    👉 Download the Authentic Self Personal Brand Assessment Now

    Let People See the Real You

    Remember, visibility isn’t just about being seen; it’s about being seen for the right reasons. It’s not merely about getting your name out there or having your voice heard. It’s about ensuring that what people see and hear is a true reflection of who you are.

    Authenticity in visibility means aligning your external presence with your internal values and beliefs. It’s about being consistent in your actions, words, and how you present yourself, whether it’s in your personal life, on social media, in your professional dealings, or your business strategies.

    When you’re authentically visible, you attract the right kind of attention, connections, and opportunities that resonate with your true self. This alignment brings not just success but fulfilment, as it ensures that you’re being true to who you are and not just playing a role that the world expects of you.

    For more insights, don’t forget to check out my book “Stop Self-Silencing”, and if you want support from me to help you on your visibility journey as an impact maker or coach, join my mini-membership The Visibility Lab.

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